Just found this in my drafts.

First of all,

Candid Xander, if you still read these: I miss you and hope you're living a life that makes you happy. 

Secondly, 

I love being poor. I love that it's been less than a week since my last paycheck and I have absolutely none of it  now because I paid a bill and my monthly rent. 

Maybe you're thinking I'm saying this just to convince myself of this, but that is not the case. I genuinely love it. 

I have many desires. I want good food, I want drugs, alcohol, vacations, clothing, and so many other things and I work in an environment that displays and sells many of the things I want. 

So many times I've picked out a toaster that I would save up for, or a dress that would have been just cheap enough and sold it to a customer that same day.
Material desires be damned and I need to remember that, forever.